The Person I Wish I Were

Okay, be prepared for a slightly depressing post on my inadequacies and failures.

This is the person I wish I were:

I spend most of my day teaching my toddler his alphabet, numbers, shapes, animals and their sounds, etc.

I wake up each morning and go to the gym and then come home and shower and do my hair and make-up and put on nice clothes

I have taught my son not to hit, kick, or spit, and he almost always obeys, helps clean up, uses polite language like please and thank you, and sits quietly and plays with his toys or reads books when we are places like church, the doctors office, in line at the post office, etc.

I always have a meal ready each evening, even if it is a little later than I'd like. But I always have at least three dishes as well as a salad and it's not always culinary perfection, but it's always pretty good and very healthy.

I have taught my son to eat his vegetables, even though he doesn't love them yet.

I am always on time to appointments, meetings, etc. Sometimes I am even early, and I always have my bag packed with activities and books for the kids, as wells as extra clothes, diapers, food, etc. I'm always prepared for every situation.

I am very dependable. I never forget when I am asked to do something and I always prepare in plenty of time so that I can do it well.

I always do little things for my husband to remind him that he is important to me, and that I love him. Notes in his lunch, a call just to say I love him, a special treat from the grocery store (usually ice cream).

I keep my home neat and tidy. Dishes don't pile up in the sink (or all over the counters), and I keep my laundry hamper empty most of the time. I iron my husbands shirts and pants so that he doesn't have to wonder whether the shirt he wants to wear that day is wrinkled. Toys get put away each night and Jeremiah has learned to clean up all his own toys after being asked only once.

I am very organized. I am the CEO and CFO of our household. Each day is productive and I never let tasks go undone for very long.

I always take at least an hour to get the kids ready for bed, bathing, brushing and flossing teeth, choosing pj's, making sure we talk about our day, read books, sing songs, say prayers and tuck in their bed by 8:00pm. This routine rarely gets disrupted, even when patience is running low and time is running short.

OK - This is the person I am:

Most of my day is spent trying to control chaos. Jeremiah watches Sesame street, or Mickey Mouse Clubhouse while I do apartment management stuff, answer emails, pay bills, fold clothes, do dishes, or just take (long) breaks surfing the blogging world for cute crafting, sewing, or decorating projects that would be so fun to do someday (someday when I get off my butt and actually do them)

Each morning I wake up. (Thats as much as I can guarantee) And I do wear clothes of some sort. Often times it's dance pants and a t-shirt. Showering... I usually remember at the end of the day that I haven't showered yet, so I take a quick one before bed, but doing my hair and make up? I usually do on sunday for church, it's a special occasion.

My child hits, kicks, spits, says rude things like "Hi Poo Poo" or "Stop it!!" and thinks that any open area is there for his enjoyment, like the post office, doctors offices, church halls, etc. He thinks they are the perfect place to "run fast like dash" and explore all the fun things that look like kids aren't supposed to touch.

Dinner... yes.... sometimes we eat it. I was doing well for a while. I was planning menus and doing my grocery shopping for the week. Lately I'm lucky if I make one dish for dinner, and have it ready sometime before 7pm.

Vegetables, yes, Jeremiah knows what they are, they are the colorful things on his plate that he won't touch.

Being on time is really just a dream now. I am generally between 10-15 minutes late to everything and I always seem to forget something that I need, a diaper, a coat (it's been below freezing the past week), a child (okay, I've never actually done this, but knowing me I totally would get Leah ready in her car seat and then forget to take her out to the car).

I have learned to volunteer for less because I seem to forget until the last minute those things I have volunteered for, or even just the things that I know I am supposed to do for months, but procrastinate and remember about the night before, like sharing time, or emails for playgroup.

My poor husband is so patient with me. He's lucky if he gets a "Hi" when he walks in the door at the end of the day. It's usually a "Hey, can you change Leah's diaper I need to go get the knives from Jeremiah that he found in the kitchen drawer". Is it so much to ask for me to simply say "Hi babe, I'm so glad you're home" before I begin the long list of things I want him to do that very same moment?

My house right now.... clean dishes still in the dishwasher (you know its bad when you just use your dishwasher as a cupboard) dirty dishes in the sink and all over the counters, clean laundry from two days ago that I finally folded today (it might get to the point where we use the laundry baskets as dressers, just find what you need for that day) I did manage to clean up most of the little toys, but the stuff that I was tripping over and just didn't want to see anymore was just put in the office and I shut the door behind me!

Bedtime is less than rigid in our house. the other night Jeremiah went to sleep finally at 11:30... Tonight Jeremiah was being less than charming and I put him to bed without a bath, brushing teeth, books, songs, prayer... nothing. Just "goodnight, I love you" and shut the door behind me. If I didn't do that I think I would have strangled the kid. (I wouldn't REALLY, don't worry, but I might have pulled my hair out, or started crying... yup, I definately probably would have started crying)

So... now that you all know how far I am from where I want to be I want your input... How do I get there? How do I motivate myself to be that wonderful wife, mother, friend and person that I want to be? What has helped you?

Grandma Curzon Photography

Just thought I'd post the pictures that my mom took of Leah when she was here for week 1. 1st - Doesn't she look different? 2nd - Isn't my mom a great photographer? Yeah, thats what I think.

Wordless Wednesday

Sleeping Arrangements

My friend Mal posted about her daughter sleeping on the floor in front of her bedroom door rather than her bed... which made me think of all the places Jeremiah sleeps other than his bed.... let's review:

Under Leah's crib.

On my lap (exhausted from NOT taking a nap that day)

On the floor with his legs THROUGH the bars of his crib.In the stroller on our walk.In our bed (that was greg's way of putting him back to sleep. It worked well).On the couch (he was playing them all of a sudden leaned over and fell asleep).In LEAH's crib. Yeah.In his high chair (mid-cholocate chip cookie).

10 Things My Parents Did Right

So, it dawned on me that it's all of a sudden November and that Thanksgiving is coming soon. I was writing in my journal about all the things I am grateful for and I thought I would share this one. I am so grateful for my parents. Its so common for people in the media to constantly talk about all the things their parents did wrong, there are so many things that my parents did right. They:

1. Taught me about the gospel of Jesus Christ, and showed me how to live righteously.
2. Loved me no matter what I did or didn't do.
3. Taught by example how to be resourceful, thrifty, and self-sufficient.
4. Stayed married and still love each other, they taught me that families are forever.
5. Sacrificed things they wanted to give me what I needed, and often just things I wanted.
6. Encouraged me to be the best I could be, and work hard in everything I do.
7. Attended the temple regularly, and taught me that temple worship can bring great blessings.
8. Were always available to talk, even when there were many things on their to-do lists.
9. Taught me that money is not the most important thing in life, family is.
10. Treated others with kindness and charity, they always encouraged me to do the same.

I love you Mom and Dad, I am thankful for you and all the things you did right.

Halloween and much much more

Earlier last month we went to a pumpkin patch with a hay bale maze, petting zoo, cow train, and homemade doughnuts. we totally forgot our camera so these are the only pictures we got on greg's phone. sorry the 2nd one is sideways, i'm too lazy to rotate it.

One of the great time fillers in our house lately is coloring in Jerem's potato head coloring book. He has recently been a little preoccupied with trains, and creates "trains" out of everything. He just lines everything up and calls it a choo choo train. This is his crayon choo choo train.
I think this was after church and he was so tired but didn't want me to get him out of his high chair. He insisted that he still wanted to eat his sandwiches, even after he began falling asleep he was still holding his un-eaten sandwiches insisting that he was still eating.
Still resisting , but fast asleep.

This is his bath toy train, and of course he had to group all the like toys together, ducks, boats, bowls, cars, and fish. (this picture was taken after he began disassembling his train)

And of course, his window-sill train. Again, it used to be much longer.

Okay, so this one was my doing: Since Leah had thrush I had to boil her pacifiers after each use. This was what was left of the pacifiers after I got distracted with laundry upstairs. The entire downstairs was filled with melted plastic smelling smoke that began to burn my throat. Needless to say we opened all windows and went on an outing for a couple hours to let the house air out.

For family home evening we "carved pumpkins" but didn't trust Jeremiah with knives, so this is what he got to do. He got to decorate his pumpkin with water-based markers. Of course that meant that his beautiful art work got a little distorted out in the rain. :) But he loved it and wanted every color in the box.

And of course after the antibiotics didn't kill the thrush we got to go into the doctor's office to get Leah's mouth painted purple (gentian violet). This is what she looked like when we got home. I thought it would be perfect, just in time for halloween, but it faded after about a day, so we didn't get to enjoy it with her martian costume. And look at those cheeks! They look a little bigger than they actually are because of the camera angle, but still, she is nearly 10 lbs now!

HALLOWEEN- Here is Leah in her little martian costume getting ready to go to the trunk or treat.

My adorable little buzz lightyear!